John Nicholson

novelist columnist writer

The Nick Guymer Crime Novels

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Teesside Steal

A Nick Guymer Mystery


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Nick Guymer’s life is a total mess. His dad has just died, he’s being made bankrupt, he’s getting evicted, his girlfriend has left him and Middlesbrough are 2-0 down in the UEFA Cup.
But there’s a way out. His father has bequeathed him a huge inheritance, if only he can find out where it is.
As he tries to repair his relationship with Julie and deal with the ghosts of his dysfunctional upbringing, he discovers his dad isn’t the man he thought he was. Soon it becomes obvious something very strange has happened and Nick begins to doubt that his dad is even dead at all. As he searches for the truth, he is plunged into a world of theft, greed and brutal murder. Soon, as the Boro play a huge European game, he will have to fight for his and Julie’s life on the windswept sand dunes of Saltburn.
Teesside Steal is set in Teesside and North Yorkshire and is the first in the Nick Guymer series of mysteries.
It is a story of upbringing, inheritance and UEFA Cup football.

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Cover art designed by Dawn Rossiter based on Tracy Hyman photographs
 
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Queen Of The Tees

A Nick Guymer Mystery


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Is the death of a leading academic a tragic suicide or a heinous murder at the hands of members of the cultish Boudica Society led by the charismatic Florence Farrell?
In the face of apparent police incompetence, Nick Guymer, best mate Jeff and girlfriend Julie are determined to find out what really happened to Jeff’s aunt Susan Rutherford. Jeff is convinced she was murdered but Nick is struggling to fight his crippling depressive moods and struggling to stay in therapy. However, with Julie’s help and determination, he begins to uncover a world of dark, dangerous, deep obsessions and even deeper, darker, long-hidden secrets; secrets that will profoundly change everyone’s lives, including his own.

Queen Of The Tees is set in Teesside, Durham and North Yorkshire and is the second in the Nick Guymer series of mysteries.
It is a novel about obsession, depression and car boots.

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Cover art designed by Dawn Rossiter
 
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Teesside Missed

A Nick Guymer Mystery


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Nick and Julie are loving their life together in rural Teesside. The summer and the sex is red hot but an invitation to a party at a local footballer’s house changes everything as a dramatic kidnapping throws them into a world of fraud and match-fixing where nothing and no-one is as they seem.
Then the shootings begin. As the murders get closer and closer to home, Nick’s world is utterly shattered, forcing him to turn from hunted into hunter. When he pursues the killer to the roof of Middlesbrough’s tallest building, he knows it’s time to go hard or go home.

Teesside Missed is set on Teesside and is the third in the Nick Guymer series of mysteries.
It is a novel about love, identity and goalkeeping errors.

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Cover art designed by Dawn Rossiter based on Tracy Hyman photographs
 
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DJ Tees

A Nick Guymer Mystery


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When there’s a brutal murder of a popular local DJ at a party to celebrate the opening of Jeff’s new record store, Nick and Julie find themselves right at the heart of the investigation. Was it a case of mistaken identity? Could Nick have been the real target? Why is Jeff lying about where he was when the murder happened?
As Nick tries to discover who killed his friend, he encounters the big, new local business hero, Davey James. But what sort of man is he and who is the glamorous woman who visits the Teesside Women Centre where Julie volunteers?
Nick and Julie’s lives are turned upside down by some incredible news. However, when there’s another vicious murder, the police need Nick to help expose the culprit and in a thrilling, violent and disturbing climax, he has to become the sort of man Julie thinks he isn’t, but who Nick secretly fears he really is.

DJ Tees is set in and around Stockton-On-Tees and is the fourth in the Nick Guymer series of mysteries.
It is a novel about masculinity, violence and relegation.

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Cover art designed by Dawn Rossiter based on Tracy Hyman photographs
 
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Teesside Blues

A Nick Guymer Mystery


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When There is something very suspicious about the Teesside Blues festival. Is Stevie ‘Big Fish’ Salmon using it to launder dirty money? Is it a tax scam? And who exactly are the Ironopolis Anarchists? Are they a pressure group holding the rich and powerful to account or something far darker and more frightening?

Old ghosts, old loves and old regrets are haunting Nick, forcing him to find an unorthodox way of keeping his blues at bay. When events take a dramatic and fatal turn, he and Julie and Jeff are forced into a confrontation with a deadly but anonymous enemy. But who is real and who is fake? And who is fooling who?

Teesside Blues is the fifth in the Nick Guymer series. It is a book about being a red, having the blues and wearing white.

It is a book about being a red, having the blues and wearing white.

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Cover art designed by Dawn Rossiter based on Tracy Hyman photographs
 
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Five Books


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All 5 books in the Nick Guymer series

Teesside Steal

A story of upbringing, inheritance and UEFA Cup football….

Queen of the Tees

A novel about obsession, depression and car boots….

Teesside Missed

A novel about love, identity and goalkeeping errors….

DJ Tees

A novel about masculinity, violence and relegation….

Teesside Blues

A book about being a red, having the blues and wearing white….

FREE SHIPPING when you buy all 5 books!

5 Paperbacks £44.95

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Cover art designed by Dawn Rossiter based on Tracy Hyman photographs
 
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The Girl Can’t Help It

An Artie Taylor Mystery


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When a liar tells you they’re a liar, are they telling you the truth?

Artie Taylor was big in the 90s but now he’s falling apart at the seams. Once one of rock ‘n’ roll’s most in-demand photographers, now he’s lost his mojo and is running away to Los Angeles from another failed relationship.
That’s when he meets multi-millionaire Colleen Holmes, a self-confessed liar, totally untrustworthy and utterly gorgeous.
When she shows him a very intimate photograph of herself and asks him to help her, Artie and his best friend Kaz are plunged into Colleen’s Californian rock ‘n’ roll fantasy world, where very little is as it seems, where lying is a way of life, where people are kidnapped and where rock stars end up dead.

Is she the answer to his dreams or a beautiful nightmare?
A thriller about life, lies and la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la means I love you.

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We Ate All The Pies


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How Football Swallowed Britain Whole

Football is weird. Damn weird. Why do we love it so intensely? Why are millions of us utterly obsessed by it? Is it a kind of drug or some sort of hypnosis? It can’t just be the 22 preening millionaires running around on a rectangle of grass that keeps us all hooked. Have you watched football? A lot of it is so boring it can make your eyes melt.

In We Ate All the Pies, John Nicholson, gonzo sports writer and long-running, legendary columnist for www.football365.com asks a question which few, if anyone has asked before; just why is football so damn popular?

Football is Britain s big love. It has consumed the nation totally. Drawing on his life as a devoted football obsessive and lifelong Middlesbrough fan, John delves into the culture that surrounds the game to discover how and why it has got under the skin of the British public like no other sport. He explores the history of the football shirt in style and design; how and why sponsorship became the norm; the culture of food inside the ground, around the stadium and in the pubs and clubs and how the modern trend of fine dining changed the match day experience (explaining why prawn sandwiches are the perfect expression of the class-politics of football in Britain).

From the crucial role booze and food takes, to the importance of shirts and merchandise, John also considers how football helps define who we are, who we think we are, how we behave, how it affects our relationships in life and how the game is used by people to vent their everyday frustrations and emotions.

Along the way, he also recounts the history of football on TV and how it changed perceptions of teams and countries (in particular, the 1970 World Cup TV revolution) and just what part the game takes in the intricate complexities of national identity, not least of being a Teessider, Northern and English, in that order!
This is a unique, funny, warm and thought provoking excursion into our football lives, told in John’s trademark off-beat, powerful and irreverent style.

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The Meat Fix


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How 26 Years Of Healthy Eating Nearly Killed Me

For twenty-six long years, John Nicholson was a vegetarian. No meat, no fish, no guilt. He was a walking advert for healthy eating. Brown rice, lentils, tofu, fruit, vegetables, low fat and low cholesterol in the battle of good food versus bad, he should have been on the winning side. But the exact opposite was true: his diet was making him ill. Really ill. Joint pain? Tick. Exhaustion? Tick. Chronic IBS? Tick. Not to mention the fat belly and the sky-high cholesterol. His mind may have forgotten its taste for flesh and blood but had his body?

Tired of being sick, John decided to do the unthinkable: eat meat and eat lots of it. Going against all the official healthy-eating advice, he returned to an old fashioned red-blooded, full-fat, high-cholesterol diet. The results were spectacular.
Twenty-four hours later, he felt better. After forty-eight hours he was fighting fit. Twelve months on, he had become a new person. His health was utterly transformed. He was first shocked, then delighted, then damn angry. The Meat Fix charts one mans journey to the top of the food chain, uncovering in the process an alternate universe of research condemning everything we think we know about healthy eating as little more than illusion, guesswork and marketing.
The body is a temple but, as John Nicholson discovered, we may have forgotten how to worship it.

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